


Suicide

by MysteryWriter36



Series: My Poems [1]
Category: Original Work
Genre: Abusive Parents, Dark, Depressing, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Personal poetry - Freeform, Poetry, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-12
Updated: 2016-09-12
Packaged: 2018-08-14 14:21:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 406
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8017366
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MysteryWriter36/pseuds/MysteryWriter36
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Just a poem I wrote one night back in November of 2014</p>
            </blockquote>





	Suicide

_Do you know how many times I wanted to commit suicide?_

_Do you know how many times I wanted to pick up that knife?_

_Do you how many times I thought about grabbing a gun?_

_Do you know how many times I've wanted my life to be over and done?_

 

_Did you really think my life was so happy?_

_Did you really think my life was at least a little easy?_

_Did you really think I've never wanted to be dead?_

_Did you really never think I'd never cried in my bed?_

 

_Did you ever wonder what was hidden behind the smile?_

_Would you guess it was all the pain I've piled?_

_Did you ever wonder if it was true when you would hear_

_About all the terrible things I've personally lived through every year?_

 

_After all the years I've heard them shout and cry,_

_I sit around and constantly wonder why;_

_Why they scream at each other, and why they cuss,_

_And why they make such a big fuss._

 

_Every time after I listen to one or both of them,_

_I just go run an hide._

_A lot of times I calm down,_

_But now and then I think of suicide._

 

_I wanna live my life_

_Without all this pain and strife._

_I don't wanna continue to run and cry and hide._

_I don't wanna keep thinking about committing suicide._

 

_I want my parents to open their eyes and see_

_That they shouldn't keep fighting and should pay some mind to me._

_They are old enough to know, though they probably haven't learned,_

_That they have lost most of my trust that they had earned._

 

_Although, through this long and painful process,_

_I'm learning to ignore_

_Every single fight they have,_

_And just shut my bedroom door._

 

_Once I'm gone to college,_

_Where with them I can be without,_

_Maybe the pain will go away,_

_And I can take a less painful life route._

 

_But until I move out,_

_I'll just continue to run and hide._

_And until I learn to ignore,_

_I'll keep hearing their words and keep thinking of suicide._

 

_I still have a few years ahead of me_

_to keep living in this life._

_I still have a few years ahead of me_

_to keep drowning in this sea of strife._

 

_But soon I'll be gone,_

_And I won't have to run or hide._

_Soon I won't even think_

_about committing suicide._

**Author's Note:**

> This poetry was inspired by a fight my parents had. Within an hour after their fight, I wrote this. It still kind of hurts.


End file.
